I have officialy graduated to multi channel thanks to ALL Outlaws.

Many things are new to me so thanks for patience and any help.

Channel calibration, trying to understand the importance and best way to conduct. Is 0db ever used? two channel? I left at 0 for all, fronts seemed quiet, very little from my surrounds, and almost non-existent sub. Set volume with no source to 0db to attempt test tone etc..however felt like it was going to be WAY too loud, even at -10db, so have fooled around at high 20's. Appears the calibration is to keep volume levels even between all 5 channels?
I feel stereo mode sends no signal to sub, is there a 2.1 mode?
Yes have completed speaker config, small, system config, correct distances.

Calibrate in the multi-channel mode you use most (DTS, Dolby Digital EX etc), with the volume control at "0" db. The resulting volume may be too loud at this setting when listening to movies, but you can simply adjust the main volume control to suit your tastes. Always calibrate with the main volume at "0" though because this optimizes the signal to noise ratio of the 950's internal gain path.

should I use a sound level meter?

As soundhound explained well, the calibration is intended to balance the levels from all five speakers. Follow the instructions spelled out in the manual and in soundhound's post above, and then use whatever volume level suits your needs. My wife's watching TV right now with the volume around -31dB.

With the mains set to small (as you indicate you have done), the bass management works in all modes, including stereo. However, many CD's will not include enough content at and below the crossover point to yield a significant signal for the subwoofer, making it hard to tell that the bass management is working.

Definitely use a sound level meter. It will make the process much easier and more effective.

thank you both, one last observation in regards to sub, same music, same level, much more bass comes out of sub on stereo 5 than stereo, sounds great, was hoping to be able to have same bass from sub on stereo though

Are the crossovers set higher for your center and surrounds than your mains? If so, that would account for the increase in low frequency material being passed on to the sub when in stereo 5 mode.

main 60, center 80, surrounds 80

Here's an experiment - bump the mains crossover up to 80Hz and try the same material in stereo & 5 stereo.